Walk a mile in my underpants

One unsuspecting neighbor reserved their parking space with this cardboard box and then left for work.

Today is recycling day.

Attention Viagra, Cialis and Hooters. You’ve officially missed your opportunity to sponsor the world’s largest erection.

http://www.cnn.com/2010/WORLD/meast/01/04/dubai.burj/index.html

Today, while searching on the Internet, I found a magic iPhone transmitter thingy that claims that it will play my iPhone music on the car stereo, using tiny invisible radio waves.

This is a device that I need.

I searched some more and discovered the lowest price for the magic transmitter on BestBuy.com. Best Buy was offering the device on sale for $59.99.

This was $2.39 cheaper than Amazon.com.

“Perfect,” I thought. “After work, I’ll make a special trip to my local Best Buy store to buy the magic iPhone transmitter.”

And so, I did.

I was in luck. My local Best Buy store had the $59.99 magic iPhone transmitter in stock. Only, there was something different about this transmitter. Namely, the price tag:

$99.99, plus tax.

“That’s odd.” I thought.

So I pulled out my trusty iPhone, activated the web browser and, again, located the device on the Best Buy website. Sure enough, $59.99.

“Maybe it’s a mistake?” I removed the transmitter from the rack, and brought it across the store to the Customer Service Desk.

“May I help you?” said the Customer Service Desk Lady.

“Yes.”

And then, I asked one of the stranger questions I’ve ever had to ask in a store.

“On the website, this transmitter is $40 cheaper. Would Best Buy be willing to match Best Buy’s price on this magic iPhone transmitter device?”

It seems that, with Circuit City out of the picture, Best Buy is now engaging in a heated price war with itself.

The Customer Service Desk Lady took the transmitter device, typed the name into BestBuy.com to verify the sale, and pulled up the listing.

$59.99.

Then, she turned to me and frowned.

“I’m sorry.” She said. “This is an Online Only Sale.” She pointed to the screen, where, sure enough, there in the corner, it said “On Sale” and then, below it, “On Sale - Online Only.”

“So let me get this straight.” I said. “Best Buy is selling this product for $59.99.”

“Yes.”

“I want to buy this product from Best Buy right now. In person. Cash.”

“Yes.”

“But Best Buy is not willing to match prices…with Best Buy.”

“I’m sorry. It’s Online Only.”

And so, for the hassle of driving to Best Buy, paying $1.00 to park on the street, searching the aisles for the device, and standing in line at customer service only to leave the store empty-handed, I went home and immediately bought the magic iPhone transmitter device from Amazon.com for $62.38 with Free Super Saver Shipping and no tax.

You’re welcome, Amazon.com. But don’t thank me. Thank Best Buy.

Kids are pretty dumb. I remember growing up, kids used to say “I’m rubber, you’re glue, whatever you say bounces off of me and sticks to you.”

How come no one ever thought to reply, “I think you’re a beautiful person?”

Someone told me that I curse like a sailor.

How come sailors are the ones who get pegged as cursers?

All of the sailors that I know drive beamers and wear L.L. Bean.

I think the saying should be, “you curse like David Mamet.”

Another sign that the apocalypse is upon us: I’ve just been invited to follow the dictionary on Twitter. http://twitter.com/dictionarycom

Pete Yorn (Syracuse class of 1996) put out his new album, Back and Fourth, today. Check it out!

PeteYorn.com

(photo courtesy of The Baltimore Sun)

Mother’s in Federal Hill now serves a deep-fried, cheese stuffed hamburger.

It really is the Greatest City in America.

Spotted Sunday on Pratt Street.

(Back in January, I went to Barack Obama’s inauguration. I never really finished writing about it, but if I don’t post it now, I figure I never will. So please pardon the abrupt ending.)

INAUGURATION 2009

The alarm went off at 4:45 am. In case you haven’t seen a mid-winter 4:45 am lately, let me remind you, it’s not the prettiest time of day.

Bleary-eyed, I opened the closet and began the lengthy process of pulling on layer upon layer of warmth. In all, the clothes weighed more than Malia Obama. (more…)